Bill “Your real daddy” Bryson

I might be a little too excited about this, but screw it: Bill “The Man Who Writes Words Good” Bryson will be in Decatur tomorrow.

Bryson, who knows no fear and once killed a grizzly bear with a semicolon, will be at First Baptist Church of Decatur. He’s promoting his new book “One Summer: America, 1927.” Doors open at 6 p.m. and Bryson will begin owning the English language at 7 p.m.

In preparation, I repurchased a copy of “Made in America,” which I foolishly loaned to a half-literate friend, and got an e-edition of “A Short History of Nearly Everything.”

Both books still hold up well and inspire terror in people who enjoy not knowing anything.

I fully expect this experience to redefine the way I understand America in 1927, a time when I was not alive. Based on my limited understanding gleaned from the History Channel, it was a fascinating time in our nation’s history. Cavemen rode dinosaurs while they waited for aliens to complete all of mankind’s monumental achievements.

I don’t know what possible proof anyone could offer to refute my well-informed ideas about the not-too-distant past, but I am interested to hear what Bryson has to say on the matter.